Investment Tips for 2009

baklawa

baklawa

New member
For all of you with any money left, be aware of the next expected mergers so that you can get in on the ground floor and make some BIG bucks.

Watch for these consolidations in 2009:

1.) Hale Business Systems, Mary Kay Cosmetics, Fuller Brush, and W. R. Grace Co. will merge and become:
    Hale, Mary, Fuller, Grace.

2.) PolygramRecords, Warner Bros., and ZestaCrackers join forces and become:
    Poly, Warner Cracker.

3.) 3M will merge with Goodyear and become:
    MMMGood.

4. ZippoManufacturing, AudiMotors, Dofasco, and Dakota Mining will merge and become:
    ZipAudiDoDa.

5. FedEx is expected to join its competitor, UPS, and become:
    FedUP.

6. Fairchild Electronics and Honeywell Computers will become:
    Fairwell Honeychild.

7. Grey Poupon and Docker Pants are expected to become:
    PouponPants.

8. Knotts Berry Farm and the National Organization of Women will become:
    Knott NOW!

And finally my favorite....

9. Victoria 's Secret and Smith & Wesson will merge under the new name:
  TittyTittyBangBang

 
i seriously thought this thread was actually dedicated to tips...untill offcourse i read it...  :giggle:
 
Here are a couple of good tips too:

If you had purchased $1,000.00 of Delta Air Lines stock one year
ago you would have $49.00 left.
With Enron, you would have had$16.50 left of the original $1,000.00.
With WorldCom, you would have had less than $5.00 left.
But, if you had purchased $1,000.00 worth of beer
one year ago, drank all of the beer, then turned in the cans for the
aluminum recycling REFUND, you would have $214.00 cash.

Based on the above, the best current investment advice is to
drink heavily and recycle. It's called the 401-Keg.

also:
A recent study found the average American walks about 900 miles a
year. Another study found Americans drink, on the average, 22
gallons of alcohol a year.
That means, on average, Americans get about 41 miles to the
gallon.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top