De facto or married?

peachy

peachy

Active member
Putting aside religion/traditions/Ayba/Parents/Being assyrian.

Would you live with someone before marrying them? Or would you rather get to know them after you are married?
 
I think anyone would want to live with them just to see how the married life would be. You can them see with your own eyes what this person is like. Example, if they're lazy, if they do anything around the house, if they make a mess more often than clean it up, if they're ever home and always out, etc etc
 
Yeah i would live with them before getting married. But i prefer getting married to them THEN live with them, that's the way i want it to be :mrgreen:
 
nope, rather wait till im married..im sure wateva little annoying habits my hubby may have i can deal with plus most of our parents survived all these years without having to live with each other b4 marriage, im sure we can too :mrgreen:
 
shamoosey said:
nope, rather wait till im married..im sure wateva little annoying habits my hubby may have i can deal with plus most of our parents survived all these years without having to live with each other b4 marriage, im sure we can too :mrgreen:
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I agree.....every1 has their flaws so there is no point of living with them before marriage.
 
shamoosey said:
nope, rather wait till im married..im sure wateva little annoying habits my hubby may have i can deal with plus most of our parents survived all these years without having to live with each other b4 marriage, im sure we can too :mrgreen:
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:thumbup:
 
we would move in together a few months after marrying, she will be placed on a 90 day probationary period...na just jk

i think if youve reached the stage of marriage you would know each other fairly well and want to spend ur life with them....so id move in after were married.....basimeh raba
 
I will wait until marriage then I will live with my guy because before marriage is when the girl is tidy; however, after marriage is when the girl lets loose. Once the kids come into the picture, you're lucky if you can still see the same girl you met before marriage.

Uffff I cannot wait until marriage. Ladies, marriage is the key to no more waxing :mrgreen: those vows are "'til death do us apart" nowhere does it say "'til she stops waxing do us apart".

:giggle:
 
michi said:
Ok, so you live with them. Then after some time, you realize that the idiosyncracies are just too great and give them a heave ho.. Mind you have tried everything that you are going to do anyway while you are married.... sex, eating together, sleeping together, everything together. SO it doesn't work out, or you can't or won't make it out.... on to the next relationship. Same thing... you try living together, eating, sleeping, sex, whatever together.... that doesn't work out. On to the next one! When does it stop? What if you can never find someone you can make it work with?

It's a little bit like the "friend-with-benefits" deal... in either case, you are looking to satisfy some needs, until other needs dictate that you can't be together anymore.

Me? No living together beforehand. I am sure that you will be intimate with whoever that you can already see what kind of person they are and what they like. You will already know if they are pigs or ultraclean nazis...
and in most cases today, the odds are that sexual issues have already come up.

Just my humble opinion. Great topic Peach! keep 'em coming folks!

pshena/bshaino
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I totally agree. But going back to what shamoosey said about our parent and not living with each other before marriage. Most of our parents married without evening dating if I am not mistaken. Times have certainly changed. I agree not living with someone unless I have been in a long committed relationship where marriage is the next step. Waiting for marriage and other premarital plans come up during two distinct lives and in order to mesh them together, why not having the two live together. Good discussion though.
 
i would like to live with him b4 marriage... i think it's a good idea.. and for those of u who are talking about sex b4 marriage... if u TRUELY want to want till marriage then u will even if u live together :2hearts:
 
RadRides said:
I totally agree. But going back to what shamoosey said about our parent and not living with each other before marriage. Most of our parents married without evening dating if I am not mistaken. Times have certainly changed. I agree not living with someone unless I have been in a long committed relationship where marriage is the next step. Waiting for marriage and other premarital plans come up during two distinct lives and in order to mesh them together, why not having the two live together. Good discussion though.
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thats even more reason not to live together, our parents didnt date and theyve survived years and years, where we get to know people before were married....anyway wicked topic :mrgreen:
 
thomas said:
the answear is very simple

if you fear god you don't live with anybody before getting married...if you take things easy (regarding religion) then yes

you can't seperate religoin etc.
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since i don't know bible in details...

do u mind telling me if it was mentioned in the bible that its a sin to live with someone before marriage!



living with someone before marriage isn't a sin, its simply a cultural value!


no i wouldn't want to live with someone before marriage...what is the fun of getting married after?
its the challanges, the surprises, the ups and downs that makes a couple stronger and fall in love more!

I am assyrian, can't pretend otherwise :)
 
I wouldn't do it. I love my sister, and because I love her, I accept all of her flaws. Even if she's lazy or doesn't put my things back where they belong. I know that's just family, but if you're in love with someone it should mean more to you. So I don't need to 'see' the person's bad habits and things like that, if you love someone you accept their flaws. If you can't accept their flaws there's no point in having a relationship with that person, as nobody's perfect.
 
yani akhnokhon....teewetoon lakha hamzoomeh basit khaya min kha kheeta le yatin modi, qamta machkhoon kha yala/brata spy o kharta takhminoon basit kheta modaleh

reeshi soorsimleh

PEACHES said with everything aside! would u live with someone etc so that means NO RELIGION!

and marian azista la, it doesnt specifically say in the bible its wrong to live with someone before marriage etc, the same way it doesnt exactly say its wrong to snort coke or have sex in a toilet or inject heroin, its just wrong cos its not a valid relationship, its not a Godly union etc, God doesnt encourage/recognise defacto relationships and sole parent thingies etc, its a social value and we all know society is Godless, i mean seriously if ur going out with someone and u decide to live together while ur still dating, chances are very high and extreme that u will end up banging each others brains out cos u have independence and freedom and hormones and woteva, u will be tempted to do it and give in to that temptation, anyways this is an issue for a different topic altogether

peachy mo widlakh bi owa booqarakh :bangin:
 
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