Can Ebay Save Assyrians from Fighting on Khiga?

It is almost a safe bet that you have been to at least one Assyrian wedding, party or outdoor picnic where there was a dispute over who will take the lead at the Reshet d’Khiga (traditional Assyrian dance)? Pretty sure it is an understatement to call it a mere ‘dispute’ for some of you, as it could often escalate into a full-blown brawl. (if you have never seen a khiga argument or fight, click on this Youtube video and FF to 3:20)

Beside this being a very embarrassing thing to even talk about-despite people becoming more civil about it with the passage of time- the problem is here to stay and is not going away anytime soon.  And if it is here to stay, why not save us some trouble by trying to find a solution for it?  A solution that is both creative and can even generate some money.

Enter the world of bidding, E-Bay style!

Yes, bid on khiga’s lead and the highest bidder to take it for the session or the song.  Implementation and enforcement aside, the idea is not just cool, but it can even generate some money.  And if someone is too cheap or doesn’t have money to be the highest bidder, then too bad.  It is better to make money from khiga than to have people to fight over it.

Now the most obvious question is:  what about the innocent and the poor, who can’t afford this?  Why should they be penalized or filtered out for the mistakes of other low-lifes? By this logic, an Assyrian millionaire could lead the khiga all night long.  To avoid this problem, a person can only lead the khiga once.  Unless no one is interested to take the lead, then they can lead it as much as they can.  Otherwise, second and third bidders could share the lead.

We have merely scratched the basic details of how this will work or be implemented.  The real details will have to be figured out by the people on the dance floor.

If you think this solution is complicated to implement, unnecessary or just too bizarre, I have a much simpler solution: for people to have a little more common sense.  That is, to be more civilized and courteous, and less pinheads. Yep, that will eliminate the need for a bidding process on Khiga.

Like one Assyrian singer once famously sang “people have reached the moon, while we, are still fighting over who will lead the Khiga.”   While there is no need for us to go to the moon yet, there is an even less need for us to fight over Khiga.

Go ahead, register the domain KhigaBidding.com before it is taken!

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